Dragon’s Lair, Things Screamed At By Over-invested Arcade Onlooker
- Oh my God, those ropes are burning!
- Oh GROSS! Those things coming out of the water have EYES on them! GET ‘EM!
- No way! The bedroom walls are trying to squish him! Get out of there man!
- I know that bottle says “Drink Me” but MAN, I don’t think you want to be drinking that!
- OH NO! The goons! Those dudes are BAD NEWS man! Kill ‘em! Kill ‘em!
- What kind of crazy castle has a room with giant rolling balls? That’s crazy man. That’s just crazy!
- BATS! Oh boy, I just do not like bats.
- Why is that lizard wearing a crown? What’s up with THAT? Why aren’t YOU the king, eh? I think you should be the king! You’re pretty cool, you know that?
- Ooooh no! Those weapons can’t be just floating in air can’t they? THEY ARE! That’s awesome.
- Look at those skulls! They want to eat your TOES! Who eats toes?! Those are the craziest skulls I’ve ever seen!
- Mudmen? In lava? I don’t know how that is supposed to work but MAN you got ‘em! YEAH!
- Agggh! The dragon! Oh man. This is going to be tough, eh?
- Ahhh!
- Ooooooh man!
- Wha!
- Go go. Oh man!
- Swing! Holy! Wow!
- Oh man! You killed the dragon! Wow! I don’t think I could ever do that. I think you and Daphne are going to be really happy together. You deserve at least that much man. Way to go!
Guilty as charged. I remember trying this game in the arcade and being utterly unable to figure out what I was supposed to be doing to NOT die. Pretty much the same thing when I tried one of the likewise-animated contemporaries, Thayer’s Quest.
Only many years later when I’d made it through and past puberty did I realize it had something to do with hitting the controls when something flashed. I totally missed that as a child.