I used to have a big house you know. Yeah, I big fucking house waaaay up there in the hills there. But that was back when fucking Pippin was going to rule the whole damn world. You remember Pippin? Pippin. PIPPIN goddamnit! Yeah, I’m talking to you Mr. Ignore Me And Play With Your iPhone. It may interest you to know… I said IT MAY you to know that Apple tried to make a game console once. Yeah. Yeah. They called it the fucking Pippin. Pippin was going to be the shit. Bye bye Sega! See ya Nintendo! Oh we were going eat you for breakfast and shit you out by lunch. But you know America had other plans. Everyone says how America is so great. ♫ AMERICA, AMERICA, God shed his something on thee! ♫ Everyone says how America is so awesome. But you know what? It’s not. We gave them titles like Exotic Sushi. Exotic. Fucking. Sushi. Oh but Americans don’t like sushi games. Well what the fuck, right? Hey about about every American right here in this bar right here… in this bar right here right now make a promise to try to broaden their horizons just a little bit this week, okay? Maybe then when the next set of videogame visionaries drop a gold mine in your fucking laps you’ll know it. Wouldn’t that be great? Wouldn’t that be JUST in world full of injustice?! Well fuck all of you, go home and play fucking Wii Bowling some more. Assholes.