Super Monkey Ball, Eventual Fate of Monkeys from

Monkeys (especially ones in labs) are not expected to lead long lives, but those monkeys who participated in the deadly blood sport of Super Monkey Ball tended to suffer even shorter lifespans. Here is what happened to them:
AiAi
While inside a ball, rolled too fast, fell off the edge and died.
MeeMee
While inside a ball, hit a bumper, got bumped off the edge and died.
Baby
After the untimely deaths of AiAi and MeeMee, Baby was adopted by a loving set of parents. Unfortunately, they were drug addicts and accidentally left Baby in a ball that rolled off the edge of a platform. Baby died.
GonGon
Tried to use a ramp to jump onto a platform filled with bananas but didn’t go fast enough and fell off the edge. Died.
Doctor
Misjudged the distance between two moving platforms while inside a ball. Fell off the edge and died.
YanYan
Survived all of the tortuous levels of Super Monkey Ball. Got rich in the banana futures business. Died of old age and was rolled off the edge of a platform in a ball-encased coffin by well-wishers.



When, oh when will OSHA finally enforce rules about railings and put a stop to these monkey tragedies?